An Open Letter To Tori Amos

Dear Myra Ellen Tori Amos,

Hi, how are you? How’s your son? *checks Wikipedia* Oh wait it’s a daughter. Doing great? That’s good. I’m fine thanks.

Anyway I’m writing you this letter because, as you know from our decades of friendship, I’m a bit of a fan. Your debut album Little Earthquakes is one of those perfect records that are a ten-out-of-ten affair from the first song to the final seconds. Each of the next three albums – Under The Pink, Boys For Pele and From The Choirgirl Hotel - were adventurous in different ways, they expanded your sound and gave us some classic singles.

The 2000s were full of ups and downs, weren’t they? I liked Strange Little Girls but a lot of people didn’t. Scarlet’s Walk was good but The Beekeeper is not a favourite of mine. American Doll Posse is my favourite of your post-Choirgirl material because it felt like the fearlessness, and more importantly the sense of melody, from your nineties recordings had made a comeback. Unfortunately, Abnormally Attracted To Sin, your latest “proper” studio album, well… I can’t beat around the Kate Bush here. It is probably one of the weakest albums a favourite artist of mine has ever put out.

You know what album I really loved, though? Midwinter Graces, the “seasonal” album that followed Abnormally Blah Blah by just six months. It was a return to stripped-back sounds, which was a plus, your vocals were excellent and the album was just twelve tracks long. Compare the hour-and-fifteen-minutes of Abnormzzzz to the 48 minutes of Graces: it really makes a world of difference. The album was concise, focused, and brilliant.

Just a little while ago you announced your new album Night Of Hunters (love the title, by the way). I’m excited. I’ll always be excited for new Tori Amos. But if it emerges that this album is 11 or 12 tracks long, with some of the clear direction that made Earthquakes, Choirgirl, Doll Posse and Graces such amazing albums, my excitement will be through the roof.

Yours sincerely,

Richard Eric

Your BFF/fan 4eva.

PS – Last time you were in Brisbane you played on the same night that Britney Spears was playing, so unfortunately that meant I couldn’t go see you. Please come back again. Also, I texted you and was like “hay tori wanna go get coffee lol” and I never got a response – think it must have gotten lost! Anyway just shoot me a message anytime.

*stares at the phone*