The Top 16 Reissues/Compilations/Remix/Live/Other Albums Of 2011, 5-1

5. KYLIE MINOGUE Aphrodite Les Folies: Live In London

Aphrodite Les Folies was the EVENT OF THE YEAR (other events of the year: Janet’s The Midsize Venue Tour and Dolly Parton live) and as with her past few tours we’ve been given a live album/DVD to savour the experience for years to come. The visuals were of course a defining moment in the history of human sight but the cavalcade of hits and fan favourites (‘If You Don’t Love Me’!) complemented selections from Aphrodite perfectly and Kylie’s vocals were at the top of their game. Of particular note is the stunning cover of ‘There Must Be An Angel (Playing With My Heart)’ – beautiful. If it wasn’t for the entire Impossible Princess era, this show might be the greatest achievement of Kylie’s whole career.

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4. THE BEACH BOYS The Smile Sessions

The most famous bootleg album of all time was finally unleashed in 2011. Sort of. This is the closest we’ll ever get to hearing the album as it would have been, and it sounds glorious. Everything that represents classic Beach Boys is here: excellent songwriting, those floating, impossible layers of backing vocals, and visionary production techniques. This music coupled with the lavish packaging – my copy came with a button for fuck’s sake – meant that while The Smile Sessions fell just short of being the best archival release of the year, it was still the one created with the most love.

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3. MICHAEL JACKSON Immortal

Yes! I’ve been wanting a Michael Jackson remix/mash-up album ever since the beginning of time and now it’s here and it’s amazing. Mixing hits from the Jackson 5 and Jacksons days right up to underrated latter day work (I cannot believe ‘Little Susie’ and ‘Threatened’ got a look-in), this soundtrack to the Cirque Du Soleil stage show sounds like a memento from an alternate universe where Michael decided to blend all his greatest hits together and embark on the greatest tour of all time. What we have in this universe is slightly less exciting, but absolutely wonderful for what it is.

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2. PHIL SPECTOR The Essential Phil Spector

This spot on the list represents the following catalogue releases of 2011:

Phil Spector – Wall Of Sound: The Very Best Of Phil Spector
Darlene Love – The Sound Of Love: The Very Best Of Darlene Love
The Ronettes – Be My Baby: The Very Best Of The Ronettes
The Crystals – Da Doo Ron Ron: The Very Best Of The Crystals
Phil Spector – The Philles Album Collection

All of these releases – along with The Essential Phil Spector - drew from the same pool of complete and utter genius, and no matter which configuration you may have bought these legendary songs in, they sound out of this world every time. The Essential is the pick of the bunch because it packs the most pop history into its two discs. From ‘To Know Him Is To Love Him’ to ‘He’s A Rebel’ to ‘River Deep – Mountain High’, these recordings are stone cold classics. Mandatory listening.

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1. KATE BUSH Director’s Cut

What a shock! Kate “Divine Goddess Of Planet Earth” Bush generously decided to bestow two albums upon us this year, and the first was Director’s Cut, a selection of songs from 1989-1993 that have been re-recorded. The single ‘Deeper Understanding’ – one of the most underrated songs of her career – was a stretched out, spacious reworking, and one that proved to be controversial due to Kate’s use of a vocoder to represent the voice of a computer. Elsewhere on the collection, ‘This Woman’s Work’ and ‘Moments Of Pleasure’ were given beautiful makeovers, ‘Never Be Mine’ revealed itself as a forgotten classic, ‘The Sensual World’ became ‘Flower Of The Mountain’ and ‘Rubberband Girl’ was transformed into a not-quite-amazing rock song. But that last one was the only version to really miss the mark, making Director’s Cut one of the most enjoyable albums of the year.

Single Review: Michael Jackson – ‘Behind The Mask’

I’ve just noticed that artwork is very similar to the 2001 special edition of Dangerous.

Weird. Anyway, ‘Behind The Mask’ is kinda (it’s only being released in certain countries) the third single to be released from the posthumous album Michael, but I can’t really get too excited about it. It’s a good song – duh – but I’m still pretty stuck on ‘Hollywood Tonight’ and to be honest I would have preferred they release ‘Much Too Soon’ or ‘Monster’. ‘Behind The Mask’ is part of Michael‘s good half, and it features some excellent, strong vocals.

Will it make anyone who hasn’t bought the album yet make a purchase? Maybe, it might appeal to fans of the rockier Dangerous tracks better than ‘Hold My Hand’ or ‘Hollywood Tonight’. Does it show us anything we haven’t heard before? Nah. Michael’s performance is really the only thing happening here that is worthy of extensive praise. The beat is great, the writing is great, but as usual, he was greater. Many times in his life he took average songs into above-average territory, and with ‘Behind The Mask’ he continues this into death and beyond.

6.5/10

There Can Be Miracles, When You Belieb… And Other Assorted Developments

I saw the Justin Bieber film last week in Geelong with my fellow Little Nell enthusiasts Adem and Ben, and I fully expected to be bored shitless. I left that cinema a Belieber. Was I brainwashed? Did I undergo a transformation that is beyond the understanding of science? All we can know for sure is that I fucking love his album now, with ‘Never Say Never’ and ‘U Smile’ becoming personal favourites. The added buzz from liking something I’m supposed to hate is a little extra incentive but Justin is a genuinely great performer. I’m pissed I didn’t figure this out sooner.

I bought this 1999 one-off single by the Main Minogue from eBay last week, which hereby completes my modest Dannii collection, as I now own all her studio releases. Again, I’m pissed I didn’t realise how great she was years ago (although I have owned The Hits & Beyond for a long time), and ‘Everlasting Night’ is a nice counterpart to her masterpiece, Girl.

The new Michael Jackson single, ‘Hollywood Tonight’, is out on iTunes now with the amazing DJ Chuckie Radio Edit, a pretty stunning remix that elevates this excellent track and makes it even better than it was before. There hasn’t been a Michael Jackson remix this good since the Blood On The Dance Floor years.

I’m thoroughly enjoying this new collaboration addiction Britney Spears has developed, and the new remix of ‘Till The World Ends’ (i.e. song of the year) with Nicki Minaj and Ke$ha pushes all the right buttons. The three best moments:

1. “You was hot when? Ricki Lake.” – surely one of the definitive lyrical moments of 2011 so far.

2. “Th-th-th-this is the remix.”

3. Ke$ha making a triumphant entrance for the chorus. I love popstar unity – I stan hard for ‘We Are The World’ in all forms – and I live for big collaborations like this, especially when they turn out this good.

Single Review: Michael Jackson – ‘Hollywood Tonight’

Apart from lead single ‘Hold My Hand’, ‘Hollywood Tonight’ is the most obvious hit on Michael, the underrated but badly handled posthumous Michael Jackson album. It is quite frustrating though – imagine how amazing this would have been had Michael been around to finish it properly. We can only guess what his vision for the song truly was, and I believe with such a strong chorus and so many little hooks here and there, this could have been a huge, huge single.

Unlike ‘Hollywood’ – Madonna or Marina, both songs work for the purposes of this comparison – this doesn’t disguise fear and darkness with sunny beats or a joyous chorus. “She’s going hollywood tonight” could easily have been about letting all your troubles go on the dance floor, like in ‘Off The Wall’ or ‘Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough’. But this is filled with dread and bitterness, with no love at all for the machine that took Michael to the top way back when. The story told within is about as old as Hollywood itself – girl wants stardom so she changes her name, whores herself out and does all sorts of degrading things – but the real draw is how Michael delivers this tale of woe. On lines like “she was taught that that’s not clean”, the disgust in his voice brings ‘Hollywood Tonight’ to a level above the other songs on the album. So, so good.

The video is okay. Like ‘Hold My Hand’, I won’t be scrambling to see it again quickly but it’s good for what it is. The video mix of the song, however, is a stupid idea. I beg of you to listen to the album version and judge that rather than this new mix, which unnecessarily samples ‘Billie Jean’.

There is always this thought of “what could have been”, and I understand why the thought of recordings completed without Michael’s input makes some of his fans uncomfortable, but ‘Hollywood Tonight’ is a genuinely good song and I’m thankful we got the chance to hear it. I will continue to imagine a world in which Michael is alive, has an epic 15-minute video for this, ready in preparation for his actual new album, but back in the real world I think this is an excellent choice for a single and the producers did a great job with it.

8/10

The End Of Year ARIA Charts Are Here! Let’s All Look Interested

In boring news, ARIA have released their end of years charts for 2010, and there are few surprises to be had. Eminem and Rihanna had the biggest single of the year, and Pink took the number one album with Greatest Hits… So Far!!!, which I suppose is a bit surprising at first considering it hasn’t been out that long.

The top ten singles of the year:

1. EMINEM ft. RIHANNA – ‘Love The Way You Lie’
2. USHER ft. WILL.I.AM – ‘OMG’
3. TAIO CRUZ – ‘Dynamite’
4. TRAIN – ‘Hey, Soul Sister’
5. KATY PERRY ft. SNOOP DOGG – ‘California Gurls’
6. OWL CITY – ‘Fireflies’
7. RIHANNA – ‘Only Girl (In The World)’
8. BRUNO MARS – ‘Just The Way You Are’
9. KATY PERRY – ‘Teenage Dream’
10. USHER ft. PITBULL – ‘DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love’

Full top 100

I like maybe four or five of those songs, which is a pretty good result, I reckon. You’re never going to love every mega-popular song so I can console myself that I haven’t fallen completely out of touch with the record buying public.

The top ten albums of the year:

1. PINK – Greatest Hits… So Far!!!
2. SUSAN BOYLE – I Dreamed A Dream
3. EMINEM – Recovery
4. BON JOVI – Greatest Hits
5. SUSAN BOYLE – The Gift
6. LADY GAGA – The Fame Monster
7. ANGUS & JULIA STONE – Down The Way
8. MUMFORD & SONS – Sigh No More
9. MICHAEL BUBLÉ – Crazy Love
10. KATY PERRY – Teenage Dream

Full top 100

Pink has been in the top two albums of the year for five years running. Think about that for a second. Five years.

I only own three of these (Pink, Eminem, Gaga) and I might buy Teenage Dream if/when it gets a re-release, and one day I’ll buy the SuBo albums, so I’m counting this as an acceptable top ten. There are a few interesting placements a bit lower – Kylie at 55, Beyoncé’s two-year-old album at 61, The Essential Michael Jackson at 63 (and at number one on the catalogue chart), about twenty positions above Michael, which I’m surprised made it in at all after only a few weeks of muted sales. Pink had the biggest DVD of the year, Annie Lennox’s Christmas album is on the Jazz & Blues chart for some reason, and the Digital Chart track continues to be pointless considering physical singles haven’t made an impact on the proper chart for ages. There is no physical singles end of year chart because they probably struggled to find 40 physical singles that were bought in order to make up a chart.

And there we go.

Things To Look Forward To In 2011

2011 is here. We can now look back on 2010 and keep it forever in our hearts as the year in pop culture where, compared to 2009, nothing happened.

What do we have to look forward to now? Actually, it seems like a lot, and that’s just from the confirmed new projects coming from some amazing artists this year. Add in rumoured stuff and we’re on our way to a year of such astounding brilliance that it will never be surpassed and could not possibly disappoint. Here are some of the things that are coming in 2011:

THE GREATEST ALBUM OF ALL TIME (ACCORDING TO LADY GAGA)

Lady Gaga has really been hyping up her new album Born This Way, and I’ll be watching eagerly to see how this era is handled and how drastic the inevitable reinvention will be. What I definitely want from this era is

1. Amazing songs (duh)
2. New hair
3. No deluxe reissue eight months after the first release (unless it’s an old album + new album arrangement like The Fame Monster) but a remix/live album instead

‘Born This Way’ (the single) is out February 13 and the album follows in May.

HOLD IT AGAINST ME

Britney waves goodbye to every other pretender releasing an album in 2011

Best song ever or GTFO.

NEW ALBUMS FROM A WHOLE HOST OF PEOPLE WHO HAVE A TRACK RECORD OF BRILLIANCE

Madonna, widely recognised as the greatest living pop artist on Earth, will release an album and even if it stinks I’ll be sure to fall over myself praising it to the high heavens. She should make sure that it is as good as the first album, Like A Prayer, Ray Of Light and American Life without sounding like any of those albums. She should get me to be executive producer. I’m unknown! I’m fresh (due to being unknown)! Someone get Guy Oseary on the phone immediately.

Pictured above with some other girl, Cher might just deliver her first album in a decade this year, and I really hope those rumours about it being a rock album are true. As amazing as her dance years were, I do not want her to come back with autotune at the ready because the sound she pioneered is now dated. What she needs is to remind people that she actually has one of the best voices in the history of pop. Stuff like ‘You Haven’t Seen The Last Of Me’ except with more guitar and less clothes.

The new Darren Hayes album will obviously be one of the best of the year.

Unless she gets pregnant, Beyoncé will probably release something this year, and considering that her albums have progressively gotten better, it should be very good indeed. Perhaps an image rehaul is in the near future, not because she needs it but because it’ll be fun? I propose she pulls a Melanie C, cuts off all her hair and releases a rock single. Actually please don’t let that happen.

Also returning after a whole decade (although it’s not like we haven’t heard from Gwen in that time), No Doubt have got me on the edge of my seat anticipating their new album. I’m really excited to see how they will fit into today’s music scene, as they seem like such a touchstone of the late 90s and very early 2000s.

I’m hoping for something in the range of “better than Volta but not as good as Homogenic“.

The new Missy Elliott has to be good, doesn’t it? It will be. I have faith. I have six years worth of pent-up faith.

Rihanna has released something every year since 2005 so I’m guessing that even if we don’t get a new studio album we will get one of the best greatest hits albums of all time, which is almost as exciting. I’m also seeing her live in a few months, so hurray for me.

THE JANET JACKSON TOUR/BOX SET

I will travel to any city in Australia to see Janet Privacy Control-Jackson when she does her Number Ones tour later this year, and the prospect of a box set is looking very real too. You know what would be great in addition to the box set? Remastered albums. Including the first two. Just imagine how great that would be.

THE DOLLY PARTON TOUR

The messiah is likely to tour Australia this year and I’m so excited that I might collapse.

QUEEN GETS THEIR CATALOGUE REISSUED

I’m finally going to expand my Queen collection beyond the three hits albums!

THE KYLIE MINOGUE ACOUSTIC ALBUM

Kylie Minogue‘s voice just gets better and better and hopefully this planned album of stripped down hits will send her in a quieter, darker direction. I want another Impossible Princess except completely different but kinda the same, dammit!

SOME MICHAEL JACKSON THING

I’m sure there’ll be a new Michael Jackson project this year, and if I may, I shall propose the following ideas:

1. The full ‘Ghosts’ video on DVD
2. Any tours or shows that were filmed to an acceptable standard released on DVD, especially the Bad and HIStory tours
3. An American release of the Moonwalker DVD, which the rest of the world has had for a few years now
4. Remastered and expanded versions of at least Off The Wall, Bad and Dangerous, a bit like Thriller 25 but no new collaborations. Feel free to also remaster and expand the other Epic albums but that probably won’t happen (yet).
5. A straight-up demo collection rather than another album like Michael (which I still think was great)
6. A re-release of the Moonwalker arcade game

THE RETURN OF GIRLS ALOUD

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP *sticks fingers in ears* IT WILL HAPPEN IT WILL LA LA LA CAN’T HEAR YOU

(And if it doesn’t happen, there’s always the Nicola album)

The 100 Best Songs Of 2010: #20-11

SCISSOR SISTERS

‘Night Work’

from the album Night Work

This album strikes a pretty good balance between fantasy and disappointing reality, and the opening track is the uplifting introduction a world that seems too good to be true. Using an extended clubbing-as-manual-labour metaphor, ‘Night Work’ slides along on a classic eighties riff and possesses perhaps the finest and most exciting chorus on the record, let alone those amazing lyrics. “You gotta keep on moving remember, this is what you asked for” – in the grand tradition of ‘Vogue’ and ‘Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough’, dancing in a club is no longer something you do for five minutes between drinking bitch beers and falling down the stairs – it is your duty and your calling.

NICKI MINAJ ft. EMINEM

‘Roman’s Revenge’

from the album Pink Friday

Oh god oh god oh god. This is the stuff dreams are made of. I get a small panic attack thinking about how much I love it. ‘Roman’s Revenge’ teams up the arguable king and queen of 2010: Eminem and Nicki Minaj, who morph into their respective alter-egos to provide us with the greatest song on Pink Friday. I could list all the best bits but I’d just be describing the song from start to finish. Of particular note are the video game sounds in the intro, the tension-filled stuttering beat, “rahh rahh, like a dungeon dragon” – oh look at me, I’m just describing the whole song. In conclusion, from the lyrics themselves to the way they are delivered with such force to Nicki’s spoken outro – everything about this is perfect.

KATIE MELUA

‘The Flood’

from the album The House

What a weird song this is. Produced by William Orbit but not sounding immediately “Orbit-ish”, ‘The Flood’ is the sort of ethereal oddball epic that leads people to screech “KATE BUSH” even though I can’t think of a Kate Bush song that really sounds anything like it. Featuring lyrics that I’ll pretend to understand and a soaring chorus that could not have been done justice by a lesser voice, ‘The Flood’ begins as a slow existential ballad, then shifts tempo to become almost a completely different song, then afterwards moves back to the style from the beginning, taking us on a little journey not unlike the musical equivalent of a fantasy film.

MICHAEL JACKSON & AKON

‘Hold My Hand’

from the album Michael

Like ‘You Rock My World’, this is one of those songs that would be number one for months if it were sung by anyone but Michael Jackson. Because the rest of his catalogue is filled with such classics, new songs that would be a dream for any new artist feel underwhelming coming from such a legend. Well sure, ‘Hold My Hand’ is really quite good, but it’s no ‘Billie Jean’, is it? Once we move on from the fact that very few songs are as good as ‘Billie Jean’, we can appreciate ‘Hold My Hand’ for what it is: a well-written and catchy R&B ballad sung by a great voice, with help from Akon, whom I don’t find as disgusting as I’ve found many other people do. I actually quike like him and his voice, so his contribution on ‘Hold My Hand’, while slightly unnecessary for a song that could easily have been done solo, gives the song just that little bit more of a kick. Either way this is the best pothumous Michael Jackson song yet.

CEE LO GREEN

‘Fuck You!’

from the album The Lady Killer

Like Motown in an alternate universe, ‘Fuck You!’ is a true classic masquerading as a novelty. Cee Lo plays our clearly hurt protagonist who hides behind big sweary outbursts instead of just accepting how upset he really is – until he breaks down halfway through, to hilarious effect. With a chorus like that, catchy and fun to yell at the top of your lungs, how could ‘Fuck You!’ have been anything less than brilliant? Instead of relying on the LOL HE SAID FUCK factor, what we have here is an expertly crafted song performed by one of the most talented vocalists I think I’ve ever heard.

HURTS

‘Stay’

from the album Happiness

Earlier this year I had to do an assignment on a new artist for my Music Business course, and I chose to analyse Hurts, and ‘Stay’ in particular. Of note was how incredibly dramatic the lyrics and production are, but all with a knowing glance to the camera, a little window in the fourth wall that tells us Hurts know exactly what they’re doing and why. Never innocent, always polished and calculated, the atmosphere and theatrics in ‘Stay’ are the key to the artistic success of the song, but you still get the feeling that a raw, stripped back version without the big drums and layered vocals may still be just as powerful. The best thing about Hurts is first and foremost the strength of their vocals and songwriting, all the rest is a bonus that takes things to another level – but the touchstone of all their work is still their talent.

KANYE WEST

‘Power’

from the album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

‘Power’ touches on so many hot topics from Kanye’s past: social injustice, paranoia, politics, how great Kanye is, how awful Kanye is, all the people who have offended him, the eternal struggle between his good and bad sides, and all with one of his most breathtaking productions. I can hardly believe how huge this all sounds, especially the centrepiece, which starts casually – “How ‘Ye doin’? I’m surviving” – and then leads into the beat dropping out ushering in that amazing King Crimson sample, then moving into what sounds like something from the Streets Of Rage Sega Genesis game soundtrack. An absolute blockbuster, ‘Power’ is superhero theme music at its finest.

KYLIE MINOGUE

‘All The Lovers’

from the album Aphrodite

Lyrically simple but surprisingly melancholy, ‘All The Lovers’ features an understated vocal performance which is framed by rich, gorgeous production and this overwhelming feeling that Kylie is growing up – I know she’s grown up before, but she’s still going – and moving on. From what? I’m not sure. But as she sings “all the lovers that have gone before…” you can feel the history in her voice, and it is a lyric that wouldn’t sound right coming from some fresh-faced Elixie DooLottle who just graduated from stage school. This is the type of pop song you need to be mature to deliver effectively, and as Kylie floats above the beat, preparing us for the orgasmic instrumental climax (the first part of the song we all heard, and also the best bit), it becomes even clearer why she survived in the industry against all odds: because she was never afraid to add extra layers, extra elements to what could have been an emotionally empty club track.

ANTOINE DODSON & THE GREGORY BROTHERS ft. KELLY DODSON

‘Bed Intruder Song’

Perhaps my favourite pop culture story of 2010 is the Ballad Of Antoine Dodson. After his sister was the victim of an attempted rape, Antoine was on the news to talk about the attacker and delivered a chilling threat: “He’s climbing in your windows, he’s snatching your people up, so y’all need to hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husband, cos they’re raping everybody out here”. The hilarious nature of this mixed with his delivery made the video an instant viral hit, and when it was remixed by the Gregory Brothers, the whole thing reached a new level of fame, even making it to the Billboard Hot 100 and the BET Hip-Hop Awards. ‘Bed Intruder Song’ also happens to be one of the catchiest and most fun songs of the year, the original quote perfectly translated into autotuned bliss. It also has the bonus of being connected to a heartwarming story of something good coming from a bad situation. And call me crazy, but maybe there is more to ‘Bed Intruder Song’ than just being a fun remix of a viral video. There is – and stay with me here – a underlying sadness to the project (it was, after all, started off by an attempted rape) which is captured in the final line: “we don’t run around crying and acting sad, we just dust our shoulders off and keep on moving”, which reminds us that there are real people behind funny internet stories like this, and that not all of them are as lucky as this guy was.

NICOLE SCHERZINGER

‘Poison’

Who the fuck would have thought? With PCD dead are her solo career even deader, what was Nicole Scherzinger to do in 2010? Here’s what: rope in RedOne to give her his best non-Lady Gaga song ever, sing it like her life depended on it, and watch it become one of the best songs of the year. And suddenly, on the verge of 2011, Nicole Scherzinger looks like one of the most exciting things about the new year. There were few pop moments this year as invigorating as the desperate cry of “I got that poison! I got that poison!!” and even fewer songs that lent themselves so easily to repeated listens.

The 100 Best Songs Of 2010: #30-21

MICHAEL JACKSON ft. 50 CENT

‘Monster’

from the album Michael

There have been several attempts throughout Michael’s career to replicate or pay tribute to the song ‘Thriller’, from ‘Ghosts’ to ‘Is It Scary?’ to ‘Threatened’ and now to ‘Monster’, one of the best upbeat tracks from the new album. Clattering beats and random screaming give ‘Monster’ a frantic pace that is replaced by quieter R&B for the chorus. So even if it doesn’t get to ‘Scream’-levels of intensity, it is still very interesting and holds your attention for the full five minutes, especially when Michael throws in little nods to ‘Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin”, even if just for split-second. I’m a fan of 50 Cent but I didn’t expect his bit on ‘Monster’ to be quite as good as it is, and mixed with the incredible production for this specific verse, it is a more-than-worthy addition to a great song.

SCISSOR SISTERS

‘Fire With Fire’

from the album Night Work

I don’t get why this was apparently such a bad choice for lead single – there are better songs on the album, but ‘Fire With Fire’ is still 100% amazing and is especially great in terms of vocals and production, which give the song this joyous, epic feel. It doesn’t represent the overall feel of the album, but when you think of it as the “morning after” to the rest of Night Work, it makes more sense, and becomes a confident look to the future. “Tomorrow has become today…”

HURTS & KYLIE MINOGUE

‘Devotion’

from the album Happiness

Dear Weird Kylie,
Oh, my love, you don’t know how much I’ve missed you. I still listen to the songs you recorded while you were here with me and wonder what happened. I know you’re in a better place now and I feel selfish for wanting you to come back but it felt like those years were a secret between us, those that dismissed you were only missing out on your greatest work. I listen to your new material from places and mindsets far away from where we used to be, and although it sounds so good it will never be the same. Hearing you re-emerge so briefly on ‘Devotion’ has given me faith that one day you will return to me, and we will drown in odd hair colours, trip-hop beats, Nick Cave duets and singles with a chart peak in the low twenties.
Come back soon. All my love,
Richard.

KANYE WEST

‘Dark Fantasy’

from the album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Shivers. down. the. spine. “Can we get much higher?” – the most incredible thing is, yes, the level of sheer brilliance can get higher and does so on the rest of the album. But ‘Dark Fantasy’ is a perfect opening track, setting up all sorts of themes and moods that will be explored over the next thirteen tracks. There are choirs, nonsensical references to Celine Dion and Leona Lewis, and that incredible bit about the séance. Also, can we get Nicki Minaj to introduce every album from now on? That’d be great, thanks.

EMINEM

‘Not Afraid’

from the album Recovery

Imagine if this had been the lead single from Relapse. Of course, it couldn’t have been because it is effectively about Relapse, but what I’m trying to say is that ‘Not Afraid’ is exactly the type of massive comeback everyone wanted and expected from Eminem in 2009. In 2010, it still sounded exciting, and had an extra element of emotion to it after the last year of drama. ‘Not Afraid’ reminds me of ‘Like Toy Soldiers’, not just because of the marching band beat but because it holds a lot of weight on its parent album and has the sort of passion and intensity to it that made Eminem such a legend.

KELE

‘Tenderoni’

from the album The Boxer

I don’t know if the character sung about here is in the closet or just over-eager to prove his masculinity, but either way it makes ‘Tenderoni’ one of the most tension-filled, interesting love songs of the year, on a scale of complexity that makes ‘Love The Way You Lie’ sound like ‘Love Me Do’. There is the inaudible chorus, where words are rendered completely useless, so all it has to stand on is that unbelievably explosive beat. When you can hear the vocals – like on the vicious “you think you are one of them” leading into the fragile “don’t be so quick to pull away” – it adds yet another layer of paranoia and anger.

KELIS

’4th Of July (Fireworks)’

from the album Flesh Tone

On an album full of hands-in-the-air moments, ’4th Of July’ is the most breathtaking. The verses are purposely quiet and subdued so that when the beat drops out, Kelis can let loose. “NOTHAN, I EVA SAY OR DEW, WILL BE AS GOOOD, AS LOVAN YEW”. As hook gives way to hook after hook after hook, Kelis moves from enthusiastic to part of the background and back again, and when she sings “just like the sky, like the fourth of july”, the music explodes behind her just like – you guessed it – fireworks, but she acts as if it is the most natural occurence in the world.

M.I.A.

‘XXXO’

from the album Maya

I thought this was going to huge. Maybe not ‘Paper Planes’ huge but it surely should have hit the top ten. ‘XXXO’ was the proper lead single from Maya and features what it perhaps the biggest and most commercial chorus to be found on an M.I.A. song, not to mention the headphone-shaking beat that begs for repeated plays. It is sung as if it was being tweeted like tweety bird on an iPhone: “u wan me be sumbody who im really not”, and the approach to both music and lyrics is almost self-consciously modern and current. Ultimately this sort of thing wouldn’t suit M.I.A. all the time but on the disappointing Maya it was a ray of light.

MICHAEL JACKSON

‘Breaking News’

from the album Michael

This is ‘Tabloid Junkie Part II’, from the newsreader intro to the “eat it/feed it” lyric pairing, but with such a thrilling Dangerous-era production style, how could I judge it for being a bit unoriginal? Another track that could conceivably have been a hit for Michael if he were alive, ‘Breaking News’ rides along on stuttering beats lifted straight from 1991, and while it isn’t a classic by any stretch of the imagination it gets closer to it than basically all other tracks from Michael.

(Ten life points to whoever recognises where the headline in the banner comes from.)

RIHANNA

‘Man Down’

from the album Loud

Remember when Kelis told us in ‘Bossy’ that she rides the beat “like a bicycle”? This is what Rihanna does here on ‘Man Down’, the best song from Loud and one of the greatest achievements of her career. Her accent is brought to the forefront here, given time to run up and down the lyrics and the chance to show a side of Rihanna that has had precious little time in the spotlight. A ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’-style narrative makes up the lyrics, and as Rihanna tells us why she “shot a man down”, it emerges that there are all sorts of frantic explanations and internal arguments about what has just happened. From “I’d never thought I’d do it…” onwards we hear this jaw-dropping series of conflicting thoughts – “I am a criminal” could be bragging until we get to the desperate breakdown of “tell the judge please give me minimal” – and all with a delivery that I never thought Rihanna could pull off. ‘Man Down’ is a triumph in every way imaginable.

The 100 Best Songs Of 2010: #50-41

MICHAEL JACKSON

‘Hollywood Tonight’

from the album Michael

This is one of the tracks from the new album that could, in theory, have been a hit single were it to be released while Michael was alive. ‘Hollywood Tonight’ opens with a dark churchy type sample thing that makes you think this is going to be a distressing ballad like ‘Who Is It?’, but it then explodes into a beat that is more like ‘Can’t Let Her Get Away’ or ‘She Drives The Wild’. A classic MJ chorus is present here, even if it isn’t lyrically adventurous, and though there are some missteps – that monologue – you can feel that this really might have been mindblowing if it had been properly finished (i.e. with Michael involved). But all we can do is appreciate the fact that it still sounds so good in this state.

JANET JACKSON

‘Nothing’

from the album Why Did I Get Married Too?: Original Soundtrack

As much as I love Janet’s filth, I had been mourning the lack of proper, big ballads on her albums from the last decade. There were slow songs – way too many of them, even – but none of them had a strong melody or memorable lyrics. I might even go out on a limb and say that ‘Nothing’ is the best Janet ballad since ‘Again’, almost twenty years ago. A slight, uncomplicated production and a gentle vocal performance make ‘Nothing’ such a nice, easy listen, and I can’t help but notice the lyrics that coincide with ‘Nothing’ being one of Janet’s first releases since the death of her brother. From “the past is something I can’t change/It’s a brand new day” to “cherish every moment like it’s our last” – it becomes there is more to ‘Nothing’ than just a song quickly recorded for a soundtrack.

ROBBIE WILLIAMS & GARY BARLOW

‘Shame’

from the album In And Out Of Consciousness: The Greatest Hits 1990-2010

I don’t really care about the Robbie/Gary saga – boring – but ‘Shame’ is a great song even removed from its real-world implications. A slightly countrified ballad with light acoustic guitar and perfectly blended vocals, Bob and Gaz trade slightly awkward pleasantries, occasionally joining the other to emphasis a wise word or two. The opening line about the versions of the truth is one of my favourite lyrics of the year, the lyric about Toys-R-Us was misunderstood, I love the chorus and the video was amazing.

JANELLE MONÁE ft. BIG BOI

‘Tightrope’

from the album The ArchAndroid: Suites II & III

From the wail at the start you know ‘Tightrope’ is going to be something else, and with its sister ‘Cold War’ it forms the nucleus of The ArchAndroid. Big Boi steps in to give Janelle a hand but it becomes apparent she doesn’t need it. She commands the horns, struts all over the beat, and grabs you by the face and doesn’t let go until the song is over. And, as a bonus, “we call that classy brass” is surely one of the top 100 spoken word bits of 2010.

KANYE WEST ft. PUSHA T

‘Runaway’

from the album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Starting with a plink-plonk piano and developing into a dark, claustrophobic beat, Kanye West’s ‘Runaway’ is the centrepiece of Dark Twisted Fantasy, running for nine minutes. It is the child of sprawling epics like ‘Say You Will’ from the last album, but this is more inclusive, a singalong rather than a lament (though ‘Say You Will’ is still better). Thousands upon thousands of words have been written about ‘Runaway’ already, and there’s not much more I can add rather than saying that I didn’t think much of ‘Runaway’ when it debuted, but now hearing it within the album in its extended version, it all makes sense. ‘Power’ might be the “superhero theme music” but ‘Runaway’ is the dissection of the superhero mindset.

PINK

‘Raise Your Glass’

from the album Greatest Hits… So Far!!!

Yes, ‘Raise Your Glass’ is simple and plays into the fact that everybody likes to think of themselves as an outsider, as “wrong in all the right ways”. But when it sounds so good, who cares how transparent it is? Like a summation of the persona that made Pink the Queen of Australia and one of the biggest popstars in the world. From “dealio” to the bit where pretends to fuck up the lyrics, ‘Raise Your Glass’ is a hell of a lot of fun, made for blanket radio play and yet it still manages to feel like a secret thing just for Pink fans – ignoring the fact that everybody and their Nana is a Pink fan. So grab your Nana, raise your glass and play up any aspect of yourself you can find that goes a bit against the mainstream.

MARINA AND THE DIAMONDS

‘Hollywood’

from the album The Family Jewels

For those outside the country, especially those interested in the entertainment industry, America can look like a whole other world. Here, Marina deconstructs that obsession through storytelling and massive choruses, which is what she does best. “Hollywood infected your brain” she sings to a character in the verse, but then in the next few lines the tables are turned: it is, in fact, Marina who has been infected. The explosion of the chorus makes this more than just an intelligent pop song, it makes it a really fun one as well, and of course this has to be one of the greatest moments of the year: “Oh my god, you look just like Shakira/No, no, you’re Catherine Zeta/AKSHULLEE my name’s Marina”.

CHER

‘You Haven’t Seen The Last Of Me’

from the album Burlesque: Original Soundtrack

What a thrill it is to hear Cher singing like this after almost a decade without any new songs. The best thing about ‘You Haven’t Seen The Last Of Me’ is the obvious real-world significance it has: at 64 and still working in an industry where 40 is considered over the hill, lines like “don’t count me out just yet” mean just as much to the queen of comebacks as it does to her character in Burlesque. There is a hint of vulnerability (“I am far from over” is a little shaky, as if she isn’t so sure herself) but it is that balance between uncertaintly and strength that makes this a classic, powerful Cher ballad that is fit to stand alongside ‘After All’, ‘The Way Of Love’ and ‘Just Like Jesse James’ in her catalogue. The dance remixes are incredible too.

KANYE WEST ft. RIHANNA, KID CUDI, TONY WILLIAMS, THE-DREAM, CHARLIE WILSON, JOHN LEGEND, ELLY JACKSON, ALICIA KEYS, ELTON JOHN, FERGIE, RYAN LESLIE, DRAKE, ALVIN FIELDS & KEN LEWIS

‘All Of The Lights’

from the album My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy

Starting off with a haunting piano interlude, ‘All Of The Lights’ has received a lot of attention due to the ridiculous amount of artists credited (of which only like three or four are actually audible), but the real story is how good the song is despite all signs pointing to it being a mess. Rihanna leads the chorus, but Kanye steals his own show, exploring the problems of a questionable character not unlike the ones he explored back on The College Dropout. Using Michael Jackson’s death as the beginning of a spiral into darkness, ‘All Of The Lights’ is much darker that the title or family singalong vibe would allow you to believe.

TRACEY THORN

‘Oh, The Divorces!’

from the album Love And Its Opposite

Tracey described Love And Its Opposite as an exploration of “real life after forty”, and ‘Oh, The Divorces!’ was the first single and mission statement. Over a simple, sad melody, we hear internal conversations, public gossiping, investigations into missing text messages and finger pointing. The blame game is presented as a sport for groups of friends: “that one was his fault, and this one is her fault” – but the depressing reality beyond the initial shock is not ignored. “The honeymoon/The wedding rings/The afternoon handovers by the swings” might be the most depressing lyrical imagery I’ve heard in a long time.

The 100 Best Songs Of 2010: #60-51

CHRISTINA AGUILERA

‘Not Myself Tonight’

from the album Bionic

I feel pretty bad for everyone involved with ‘Not Myself Tonight’, because I assume they lived with the song for so long that they came to understand how good it really was, but it is very much a “grower”. In an age where many people will listen to a song once on YouTube before making a decision on how good or bad it is, ‘Not Myself Tonight’ was destined to sound underwhelming. But there are so many little bits here that take time to make themselves known: “I don’t give a OWWW”, the rapid fire bridge, that middle eight where Christina gets to have a proper wail – only for it to be broken up by an electro stutter, not to mention the chorus, which followed me around in my head for weeks before I gave in and admitted that it was, like the rest of this song, actually amazing.

ROBYN

‘Hang With Me’

from the album Body Talk Pt. 2

This might have the best chorus of all the Body Talk singles, coasting along on Robyn’s trademark bleeps with just the right amount of weariness and excitement. While she plays the victim on ‘Be Mine!’ and ‘Dancing On My Own’, on ‘Hang With Me’ Robyn takes charge of the relationship. This time she’ll be one breaking hearts. “I know what’s on your mind/There will be time for that too/If you hang with me” – perhaps in the past, rampant sexual desire led to an unstable relationship, and that won’t be happening again. But does she really want to “hang” with this guy for ages just to protect her own heart? There’s a hint in the uncertainty of that vocal.

EMINEM ft. LIL’ WAYNE

‘No Love’

from the album Recovery

One of the most chilling moments on Recovery, ‘No Love’ bases itself around a Haddaway sample and strikes a perfect balance between the trademark styles of both Eminem and Lil’ Wayne. The first half sees Wayne laidback but disappointed, betrayed and yet confident, ready to cut out anyone who crosses him. His icy demeanour is threatening enough, but Eminem goes even harder, trading Wayne’s cool for intense anger, in true Slim Shady style. The slight failure of Relapse seemed to spurn Eminem into some of his most vicious raps in 2010, at least in delivery if not lyrics, and ‘No Love’ is one of the best songs he lent his voice to this year.

PROFESSOR GREEN ft. LILY ALLEN

‘Just Be Good To Green’

from the album Alive Till I’m Dead

Like a good pair of leads in a film, Professor Green and Lily Allen exploit their characters so well in ‘Just Be Good To Green’, playing off each other and disappearing so far into their chosen personas that it almost becomes parody. Apart from their vocal duel, one of the most underrated aspects of ‘Just Be Good To Green’ is the instrumental, which takes tiny little elements from the retro revival from a few years back, mixes them with a hip-hop beat and then lifts it all up into the chorus perfectly. That we get lines delivered as wonderfully as the “I ain’t never gonna change, are you ever gonna realise?” bit is just a bonus.

KE$HA

‘Take It Off’

from the album Animal

In an explosion of Auto-Tuned bliss, ‘Take It Off’ explodes out of the speakers, grabs you by the neck and slams you face first into the dance floor. Watch out there aren’t any stray bottles down there though, because that could hurt. With one of the classic screamalong choruses of the year, you forget all the questions that come with this song (why isn’t anybody slipping over in all that glitter on the floor? does she ever brush her teeth with a toothbr-oh wait that was ‘Tik Tok’) and just lose yourself like Eminem in 8 Mile.

BENNY BENASSI ft. KELIS, APL.DE.AP & JEAN-BAPTISTE

‘Spaceship’

In just over three minutes, we get the only Benny Benassi single to catch my attention since ‘Able To Love’, featuring Apl.De.Ap in the best thing he’s been involved in since ‘Boom Boom Pow’, and Kelis in her best song since… well, the last amazing one. This is a club song, for sure, with those endless repetitions of “get high”, but Kelis gives it a bit of a “mystical” twist with her floaty vocals, which suit the track perfectly and elevate it above your average dance floor anthem.

HURTS

‘Better Than Love’

from the album Happiness

The deep, dramatic vocals, the soaring chorus, the frantic ‘I Feel Love’-style bits: it’s all been said before I need to say it again, this is totally eighties. Like the atmosphere of Tears For Fears had a baby with the pop sensibilities of Culture Club, which then grew up to marry early Eurythmics, ‘Better Than Love’ manages to be an affectionate nod to the sounds of yesteryear while never sounding like a mere tribute. Buried underneath all the “is this from 1983 or 2010?” is a really, really fantastic song.

MICHAEL JACKSON

‘Much Too Soon’

from the album Michael

As I said in my review of Michael, ‘Much Too Soon’ lives up to that simple title. We all know Michael and his producers had a tendency to overproduce – for better and for worse, usually better – but on ‘Much Too Soon’, there is not too much to speak of other than a quiet few instruments and Michael’s voice. Like one of his classic Motown ballads, except with his adult voice, ‘Much Too Soon’ is lyrically slight and vocally very fragile and subtle. “And would you like to go with me?/And she answered no to me” is an awkwardly structured pair of lines but it works so well with the other elements of the song – it is perhaps the most “classic Michael” moment on the new album.

JANELLE MONÁE

‘Cold War’

from the album The ArchAndroid: Suites II & III

‘Cold War’ and ‘Tightrope’ are like part one and part two, and while ‘Tightrope’ is cooler and more relaxed, ‘Cold War’ screeches along on huge, amazing drums, while Janelle rampages over the top. “This is a cooooold waaar, you better know what you’re fighting for” she tells us, and while guitars appear for a quick solo here and there, instruments and beats drop in and out all over the place. A complicated hot mess, ‘Cold War’ was one of the most exhilirating singles of the year.

MASSIVE ATTACK & TUNDE ADEBIMPE

‘Pray For Rain’

from the album Heligoland

The standout track on Heligoland was the album opener, which manages to translate that feeling of an impending storm into music. Featuring vocals from TV On The Radio’s Tunde Adebimpe, the song unfolds slowly and quietly, with lyrics full of beautiful imagery and an insistent drum pattern which guides everything forward. Reminiscent of the best tracks from 100th Window, like ‘Butterfly Caught’, ‘Future Proof’ and ‘A Prayer For England’, ‘Pray For Rain’ uses haunting vocals to build an otherworldly atmosphere like only Massive Attack can.